Have you ever stopped to think how crazy the fashion industry is? Some mincing fop in Paris decides that males would look a lot hipper in bilious green terry cloth safari suits and fire engine-red propeller caps, so every guy who doesn’t want to be labeled a dork races out and buys a bilious green terry cloth . . .Read more
All of us experience certain rites of passage as we make the often arduous journey from adolescence to adulthood: pimples, that first crush, getting a driver’s license, disco-dancing naked on a neighbor’s front doorstep, wearing a German spiked helmet. Okay, maybe not everyone gets pimples. But if . . .Read more
Every decade has its fair share of crappy music. The ’50s gave us “Giddy Up A Ding Dong,” “Martian Hop,” and “Short Shorts.” The ’60s gave us, “Sugar Shack,” “Tell Laura I Love Her,” and “Snoopy Vs the Red Baron.” The ’70s gave us “Lucky Stars,” “I’ve Never Been to Me,” and “We Do It.” And the ’80s, well, the ’80s . . .Read more
One of my least favorite subjects in high school was history. To me history was something that involved mainly people very different from me, who lived in far-flung places hundreds and thousands of years ago. I used to wonder what possible relevance it could have to me in the here and now, shallow . . .Read more
Okay, I have a confession to make: I haven’t been banned from Warrior Forum, though I was racing like a lemming on a rocket sled in that direction. But “Why I Don’t Post on Warrior Forum Anymore” just didn’t have the same attention-grabbing pizzazz. Think of this article’s title as my tribute to the rectitude of . . .Read more
Count Meinrard is a pompous, self-proclaimed former karate champion with more middle-aged spread than a 30-year high school reunion. Together with his bumbling assistant, Harry, he travels Australia, righting wrongs and beating up bad guys—or so he says. Truth be told he just makes a complete fool of himself and causes considerable property damage in the process.
In “The Shopping Mall Misadventure,” the Count gets more than he bargained for when a humongous teenage boy turns on him during a karate demonstration. If that wasn’t bad enough, he then finds himself facing a bigger threat: the boy’s even more humongous mother.Read more
You walk into a store to buy a certain product. All you have to do is find it, take it to the sales counter, and pay for the thing. You already know that the store has plenty of them in stock and at a good price, but you end up storming out of the place without it. What went wrong?
Government surveillance of citizens is running wild. Spy drones patrol the skies, private emails and telephone conversations are intercepted, security cameras monitor your every move and, if all that wasn’t bad enough, now there’s the growing phenomenon of targeted individuals. These are people who . . .Read more
Back in the days when I stood shorter than my mother, the boy who lived next door to me trapped a sparrow in his dad’s garage. He didn’t hurt it. He just wanted to see it fly around for a while. After about ten or so minutes of watching it flutter hither and yon, he raised the garage door and let it . . .Read more
What is it about our canine companions that makes them so darn lovable? It’s not like they help with the housework, do the shopping, or pay their share of the bills. And when they’re not dropping twirlies for us to step in, staining the lawns yellow, or scaring the flapjacks out of hapless mailmen, they’re just . . .Read more